Friday, January 18, 2013

Please stop showing that much love on me !!

My friend came to stay over with me for a few days. He's sensitive, talks too less. Like I was previously( don't know whether I'm still).

I was helping in some situation and I was just showing genuine not over care.Then he said to me that made my senses on " Don't show love on me, I can't handle"

What is this feeling? When I heard those words, I felt like I was seeing my own reflection. How can one make that opinion?

Take me. I too had been rejected. So, may be he also got rejected. The intensity of that feeling is so potent  i guess.

Did they reject me? May be . May be not. Because they haven't told me their opinion about me . I'm sensitive.May be this was the very reason creating all this nonsense. Of course it is nonsense. I used to keep thinking and judging about what others were thinking about me. Famous Dale Carnegie said- Don't think of what others might think about you if you are going to do something. Instead do something that makes others to think good about you.

The hatred is such a high intensive thing. It makes us to make our own judgements. And I assumed and believed things to be true until I face that are not.

I've learnt that I should prevent myself from showing anger which basically anger because of myself. My friend told me that " He is the person who easily gets angry is the one who can't solve his own problems/baggage.So much confusion.

Carrying the guilt for long is not good. May be somethings are bound to happen. And not valuing oneself is also not good. I was there once. Some authors' books changed my thoughts. I started believing in myself and I have value.


Twisted

Some stories show villains as evils or dangerous. I believed it. But later on, it came to know that some people are with some twisted beliefs. But I have not seen any body till I join my new office. Here is an office boy, with twisted mentality or twisted beliefs.

The work he has to do is to go and buy somethings. Some times there will be a bill shown to us and most of the time no bill. Just he won't say anything. And we have to imagine that he has spend all of it to bring these things. He lies very easily. Initially, I thought he's morally damaged. Of course I know that morals we form because of our community, religion and more important is his experiences with outside world. He interpreted those incidents as general ones may be.

He once told me that he's in high debt and needs ready money, and he shared his thought of creating fake bills. I told him that's not correct. He said, " How should I make a living then?" I said " You'll get money based on how much you work." He din't argue later then.

Then I read something about stealing. Why people steal? 1.Because easy to steal. 2. There will no evidence that I've stolen. And with Consistency principle he acted more than once. He's still doing it. And I must say, our office administration is damaging him morally, in some way.

The main point is how he is getting rationalized?

" Nothing sedates rationality like large doses effortless money"- Warren E. Buffett.

I came to know about this quote from Prof. Sanjay bakshi. Reading revealed, there are many cognitive process are in the show. He knows what it takes to earn so much money. I know this : " There is no such thing as something for nothing."- Napoleon Hill.

What is about morals? My brother told me this " The level of morality depends on the shame of yours".

In the initial case, he had these thoughts in his mind. But not concrete enough. Then at the first time he'll be having so much difficult war of thoughts regarding morals in his mind. But there is a big justification because of that stealing. Justification is getting effortless money. He made those beliefs concrete.

This is what happens if there is less integrity. I don't know how to make the system to change his mind frame work. I have to think of it.